So...life has always been a series of changes but lately I am feeling like I need to grip the change and use the momentum to propel me through life in a better direction. Thinking that maybe a series of small but important changes may be the path I have been looking for. Or maybe bigger changes but that might freak me out so maybe I start small and work up to that down the line.
First things first. I need a hobby. A healthy hobby that could help me figure out who I am now, as as almost 42 year old woman with an empty nest and a (nearly) open mind. I have always loved to write and have used that as an outlet to express myself in ways that my verbal abilities seem to lack. But I also want to reach out and beyond that, to step at least a tiny bit away from my comfort zone and explore a bit outside that. I mean I am cute, have some confidence and am not really afraid of very many things, except being out of control and having no control over the way I am feeling. Yes, these things may seem very similar but they are actually quite different. But I digress....
Starting Monday, October 1st, I am starting my favorite way to deprive myself in the most effective way possible, The Whole Thirty "eating plan" or diet, or whatever you want to call it. It's basically 30 days in which I can only eat fruit, vegetables, meat and like two other things. No alcohol, cheese, milk, bread, sugar, pizza, french fries, chicken strips, salted caramel cold foam cold brew or hamburgers (at least with a bun which I usually forgo anyway so that's not really one). Yeah, it sucks but 1) it's only 30 days and 2) it really helps re-tune my body and my mind together and puts me in a better frame of mind all together, at least after the intensive cravings subside. So it's worth it and I consider myself a fairly strong person who can endure when I feel it is beneficial to my long term sense of self and well being.
And yes I would like to drop a few pounds but that is not something that defines my life. I like myself, I like being curvy, I like being different from others, not crammed into some box that the media or Hollywood have created for women to fit into it. I like to do things on my own terms, and it definitely is time for me to get into better shape. I love working out, feeling strong and able, but yet feminine and sexy at the same time. I just get bored easily so one thing I will be working on is finding new exercises and meals that are satisfying and keep me striving for more.
SO eating better and working out are the first steps to my journey of self-discovery but I want to do them in ways I have not tried before but that are also not disgusting. I am super picky eater in that I don't like to try what I have decided I don't like usually without trying it. Not a veggie fan unless they are raw or in a salad with a spicy dressing and some ham and salami. I love breakfast more than any other food group (yes you read that correctly) and potatoes are a staple in my life. I think they have to go for at least two weeks but that might be a day by day decision.
As far as working out, I love running, especially intervals, sometimes I really want to force myself to run longer but intervals are so amazing for fat loss that it makes it hard to be motivated for that. Definitely need to get back in the gym, lift some weights, throw in some Tabata type workouts, work my body out and drive towards change.
Change is definitely the tune I am singing right now, more like progression but for that change has to occur first.
